Do you lie more than seven times per day? Compulsive liars do.
We all know that one person who we call a compulsive liar or a pathological liar- even if it is only in our heads. They seem to lie so much that they cannot recognize their own words as a lie. The problem arises when the lies hurt the liar or someone else. After all, your friend, who you believe might be a compulsive liar, might be suffering from severe mental health issues.
What is compulsive lying?
Compulsive lying happens when a person habitually lies, often for no reason. Studies show that normal lying includes telling 1-2 little lies per day and 1 big lie per week. Prolific lying involves telling 6 little lies and 1 big lie per day, and prolific liars tell the majority of lies. Normal lies and prolific lies are not considered pathological lying because there is a reason for the lies.
Is compulsive lying a disorder?
Compulsive lying also referred to pathological lying, habitual lying, mythomania, or its previous psychological term- Pseudologia Fantastica– is not a mental health disorder. However, it can be a symptom of Narcissistic Personality Disorder (NPD), Borderline Personality Disorder (BPD), Antisocial Personality Disorder (APD), and it can also be a result of alcoholism, such as in the case of Korsakoff’s Syndrome.
How do you know if you or someone you love is a compulsive liar?
While compulsive liars often share many the same behavior patterns, studies show that people correctly identify a lie only a bit less than 55% of the time. That is because compulsive liars often include in-depth details in their lies. In addition, when you ask them about their lies, they often tell more lies to cover up the previous lies. Sadly, many compulsive liars have lied so much that they do not know when they are lying.
Since there is no definitive psychological profile for liars, research has not identified the body language compulsive liars use. Research does not support many of the theories like the Baseline Method. Unfortunately, many of the body language cues people have thought for eons indicate lying are so commonly known that many liars use this knowledge to avoid the “lying” body language. Interestingly, this compensation has led to many liars staring directly into the eyes of the person to which they are lying- more than they usually would- to fool them.
Common behaviors of a compulsive liar
Compulsive liars often use email or text messages more often than phone calls or in-person meetings. They also tend to lie about things that cannot be proven a lie, leave wiggle-room in their lies by using words like “mostly,” or inject truth into their lies for believability.
Practice makes perfect.
While poor liars often rely on being vague, compulsive liars often lie more than six times per day and tell the same story repetitively, and that practice helps them improve their lying. However, compulsive liars are not intentionally manipulating people most of the time. Instead, it is an unintentional habit.
Why do some people with Borderline Personality Disorder compulsively lie?
People with borderline personality disorder often compulsively lie to avoid feeling ashamed. Since many suffer from intense emotions, they compulsively lie to make themselves feel better. Many people with Borderline Personality Disorder suffer from extremely low self-esteem, and lying allows them to create a persona that they think is good enough. The lie subconsciously fills their need to be seen positively by others and will enable them to feel temporarily empowered.
Why do some people with Narcissistic Personality Disorder compulsively lie?
First, you must understand that Narcissistic Personality Disorder is a “legitimate disorder that involves more than somebody who suffers from a general dose of vanity.” It might be helpful to forget all the negative press about “narcissists” so you can view this situation as it is- a mental health disorder.
Narcissism often causes the person suffering from it to appear to be in love with themselves, with a superb sense of self-importance. They need the positive attention and admiration of others, and developing narcissism seems to correlate to their childhood history, neurobiological factors, and inherited genes. To say the disorder is complex is an understatement. However, as with most things in psychology, the amount of research has picked up over the years, and researchers are gaining an enhanced understanding of narcissism.
On the outside, narcissists appear to be selfish, but they are struggling with severe lack of self-esteem on the inside. As a result, they lie to make themselves feel better about who they are and to appear better in the eyes of the one to which they lie. Ultimately, it can be difficult for someone who suffers from narcissism to develop self-worth internally, so they seek it from outside sources.
Why do some people with Antisocial Disorder compulsively lie?
Antisocial Personality Disorder is characterized by a disregard for safety, laws, or social norms. Those with Antisocial Personality Disorder exhibit impulsive behavior, can be aggressive, and might not show remorse when harming someone. Lastly, they often avoid taking responsibility for their own actions.
Unfortunately, underneath all the abovementioned disorders is a perfect recipe for deceit- intentional or not. For example, those with Antisocial Personality Disorder might compulsively lie because they get caught breaking the law or because they have hurt someone. Someone with Narcissistic Personality Disorder might lie because something made them feel stupid, and due to how they were treated as a child when they made bad grades, they cannot handle feeling dumb. A person with Borderline Personality Disorder might create an entire make-believe world where they are exactly as they want to be seen because they feel worthless.
The important thing is understanding that there is a mental health reason for compulsive lying. If you or someone you know suffers from mental health illness, reach out so we can help.
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